TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
