can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
