Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
