I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize
