I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he told me I talked like a deaf person
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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