dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
