what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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