Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
