so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
