please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Randomize
