maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Randomize
