Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
