What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
His hands were made for my vagina.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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