Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
