Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I have tasted many bathrooms
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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