I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
