Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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