but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
