guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
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