Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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