Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
