you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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