im so drunk with asians
where?
always
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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