I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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