So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
