glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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