Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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