If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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