I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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