There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
