Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
