I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
