That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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