you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Randomize