there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
They have beer where we have blood.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize