im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
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