But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
