She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
