How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Randomize
