I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Randomize
