Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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