I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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