Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
