: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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