My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
