Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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