Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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