Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
