Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
