So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
He shit in the fireplace
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